June is LGBT+ Pride month, and to celebrate, we are sharing the adoption story of one of our same sex couples, Tom and Lee, who adopted their little boy, who was 1 years old.
Here at Adoption mid and West Wales, there are no barriers when it comes to welcoming the lgbt+ community to be assessed as adopters.
We’ve approved a number of new families from the lgbt+ community over the last few years and here’s what Tom and Lee had to say about their adoption journey.
As a same sex couple who always wanted to have a family of their own, adoption was always our first choice. Together we had a firm understanding of children’s needs through working with LAC children and coming from large families. We knew that we could meet the needs of an adopted child and knew that we could offer a loving, stable forever home. From the get-go we were welcomed with open arms by Mid and West Wales Adoption Team. From the initial phone-call we felt listened to, and that their approach was far more in-depth than the other agencies we had approached. For us we wanted the process to be thorough and for no stone to be unturned as inevitably we wanted to find the best match for us and for our child.
Like all couples considering adoption, research was our first step into this seemingly terrifying world of adoption. There are some fantastic books, podcasts and blog posts out there. Try and connect with other adopters and make sure you enter the process with an open mind. We will all approach the process with our own misconceptions, however keeping an open mind and being reflective is our top tip. Make time to listen and consider different angles and perspectives. You may have heard that the assessment process is scary, and your social worker will stare deeply into your soul, however this isn’t quite the case. Be honest, be reflective and you will wholeheartedly, weirdly enjoy some elements. You may even come out the other end knowing yourself and your partner better. It really is like free therapy!
The process definitely becomes emotionally draining and building a support network and having a supportive family is important when this happens. Our family members attended the family training course and found it very informative and helpful. Additionally, you will meet some fantastic families through adoption who will remain great friends for a lifetime. You may even meet these people on your preparation course. We remember the relief as a same sex couple after seeing another same sex couple on our training. There is something comforting about not being the only ones for sure.
After the training, it was full steam ahead with the assessments, panels and matching. Your journey will be very personal to you and no adoption journey is the same. Trust your social worker and make sure you approach every decision together as a couple. Times will be tough and it will be an emotional rollercoaster. However, no matter the hurdles it will all be worth it when you hear the pitter-patter of little feet in your house for the first time or the first time you open the door and realise that there’s a little persons shoes lying next to yours.
We are also on Facebook @adoptmwwales and Twitter @adoptmw_wales